From the Desk of Dame Edna
Dear Dame Sarah,
The Last Night of the Proms
How sweet of you to seek my advice. I wish I could say you were alone in doing so, but I am approached by so many people with so many problems that you`d think I was the repository of all wisdom. Perhaps I am.
Most of my gorgeous frocks were designed by my son in Melbourne and they are "one offs". I have another clever man in Sydney called Billy Goodwin, who makes my gorgeous Sydney Opera House dresses and anything I need with a marsupial motif. He`s even made a frock for me with a button in a bead that I only have to caress for the whole dress to start flashing and winking its little coloured lights. Can you imagine what that does to the applause level? In London there`s a wonderful firm I would recommend called St. John Roper, 115A Cleveland St. London W.1. I am sure they could make you something fabulous that will bring the house down, if only you can get someone else to foot the bill, perhaps a TV company, and mention my name. Spookily enough, it does seem to work magic. I wish I had something I could lend you but I am sure I am too statuesque for you.
Good luck on the night of nights and a joyous heart always.
PS - Don't throw this letter away Possum! One day soon it will be a priceless collectors item.